The holidays are coming up again, and you know what that means: the social pressure to do something. You’re supposed to be with friends or family, share a cozy meal, and if you say you’d rather just stay home, you get that look. You know, the one that says, “Is everything okay? Why aren’t you with others? Is something wrong?” Well, no. Nothing’s wrong. But believe me, I’m so happy not standing in line for yet another social engagement.
As a single mom and entrepreneur, I’ve already got enough on my plate. My days are filled with the beautiful chaos of my child, work, household chores, and if I’m lucky, a tiny moment for myself. But somehow, as soon as the holidays approach, everyone seems to think I can’t possibly enjoy myself alone. “Why would I spend my time on social engagements just because it’s ‘the holidays’? Every holiday is your chance to pretend you’re a social creature, so go for it!”
I have to admit: I love my quiet moments. My child is asleep, the phone is silent, and I get a chance to do absolutely nothing. And trust me, that’s pure gold when you’re always expected to be “on.” And the moment I say I’d rather spend my time alone, I get that strange look: “But you’re not really alone, right?” Uh, yeah. I am. And I’m totally fine with it. Honestly, I’ve gotten really good at enjoying my own company.
So yes, I’m staying home. Not because I’m some sad, lonely person (I mean, my couch and I have a serious relationship going), but because I love not having to rush off to some party, not having to cook the fifteenth dish, or not having to suffer through another awkward conversation.
Society has always told us that “being together” is the ultimate form of happiness, and that you’re missing something if you’re alone. But I wonder – why? If it’s your own choice to stay home and not feel the need to perform, is that really so bad? Because when someone asks me, “Why aren’t you with other people?” the answer is simple: Because I’d rather be in my cozy clothes on the couch than pretending to have fun somewhere just because the calendar says so.
I may not be with everyone else, but I am with myself. And sometimes, that’s exactly what I need. I can finally breathe, let the chaos go for a moment, and just enjoy the peace. I don’t need to meet anyone’s expectations, and that’s freeing.
So yes, I’m staying home. Not because I’m pathetic, but because I deserve it. Because when I switch back into mom-entrepreneur mode, I want to do it from a place of rest, not total exhaustion. And you know what? The highlight of my week? That one hour on the couch with Netflix, a blanket, and zero social obligations. Just disappearing into my show and pretending the world doesn’t exist for a while.
So to anyone feeling stressed about what they “should” be doing during the holidays: let it go. Give yourself permission to choose you. Whether that means being with others or spending a few days with Netflix and chocolate (in your pajamas, of course). Because sometimes, being alone is exactly what you need to recharge – and to just be, instead of constantly doing.
Love,
Jennifer
